Tuesday, December 31, 2013


I don't make New Years resolutions, the world is already filled with enough broken promises. 

Manhattan was not made into a walled off maximum security prison in 1988.
You neither called nor respected me the next day.
And I still don't own a flying car OR personal jet-pack.

What I will do instead is continue to fill you with awe by regaling you with tales and truths about Me.

When I was a teenager I really really wanted to sleep with Marie Osmond.

Happy New Years everyone! 
(especially you Marie)

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